By Ediale Kingsley
Greatest Of All Time, King Of The Sport, Bender Of Air, Killer Of Defenders, Goal King, Barca’s Glory, Messiah Of Distribution, The god Of Soccer and the only actual real superhero aside the religious immortals.
May your reign last forever. Forgive those people who mock you for falling to the blades of Anfield. I see how they have all brought their seats and mats to the market square of life to enjoy a crowd laugh.
They unite to mock you. They have one thing in common. They have all endured the truth. The truth that you are the GOAT. First, they deny, then they believe in their hearts but reject with their lips.
A syndrome that has now affected their minds. Their biases are well understood. You have dealt with all of them. They have suffered from your snipping skills. All of them have been humiliated at one point in time. Your left foot has produced bullets sporadically. Your right foot has done uncountable nailings.
It is only natural that they enjoy this moment. At least they all agree that you are the GOAT. I see their memes. They have all posted pictures of a slaughtered goat. And I am pleased. So pleased they finally agree. It is not uncommon to fall, or to be slaughtered.
In the Bible era, a certain SHEEP was slaughtered. This time a GOAT fell at Anfield. That time a SHEEP at Calvary. The different stadium, different heroes, different enemies. But the Sheep rose again! He had the last laugh.
You will have the last laugh. You will raise again. There’s only one GOAT. When the other one fell to the small boys from Amsterdam. No one killed a goat. This is symbolic of the truth. We all know the truth. And thankfully even the enemies have announced such truth.
Like the SHEEP, the GOAT will laugh last when he is pronounced Best Player of the year. For the 6th time. No one played like you this season. No one scored like you this season. No one dominated the midfield like you. No one dominated the attack line like you. No one. Not this season.
So we await your crowning ceremony. This one is gone. You have singlehandedly carried the team to this stage. You have other trophies to keep you warm. The UCL will go for this season. It won’t be in the hand of our enemies. In sort, they didn’t win a spoon this time.
As for the other one. The one whose name is not even worthy to appear in this ‘letter to a god’ piece. As for him, he had no meaningful impact this season. He went to Italy to do the ordinary. Nothing changed. They got to the UCL finals without him. They had better exploits without him. The only thing that changed is the Italian ladies.
He has probably gone there to woo some, sleep with some and rape some. That’s his trademark. He is a fine boy. A model. A good piece of bodily structured eye catcher. The ladies are glad he is in Italy. He is also ready for them. He just acquired the most expensive car on planet earth so he can take the ladies to planet Jupiter.
The enemies said you are a one club man. I ask them is that not what we all pray for? Don’t we all want that kind of loyalty that will keep our heroes in our clubs? Didn’t Liverpool almost got damaged when their Coutinho left them? Are Chelsea not hoping Hazard stays and not leave? Did United not wish they could have made the handsome man stay?
And most importantly, does a man needs to leave his marriage to try other marriages to prove that he is a great man? When they want to insult Barca they say, ‘No Messi, no Barca’. Then they are willing to agree that you are a huge tree, great enough to make a forest.
When they want to insult you they say, “No Barca, no Messi”. Yes, that’s what they mean by asking you to go try your legs in other clubs. They are confused. They need to make up their minds. They need to choose one:
“No Messi, No Barca”
“No Barca, No Messi”
At least they have already chosen who the goat is today. So tomorrow, they could as well agree to the truth that you are the greatest and Barca is the greatest club ever. Simple truth. Difficult to accept by the enemies.
Why do they like the handsome one? Because they can all have a piece of his glory. They can all share from his exploits. He was in England, so the EPL fanatics have a claim to some part of him. Same thing with other places.
But you are not like that. You are not a prostitute. Other ladies can die if they want. Your loyalty is to one. One club. One wife. One mother to all your kids. One.
Thank you for loving us. I can’t imagine the heart breaks some Chelsea fans will go through as Hazard packs his bag for Madrid. You are loyal. You are humble. God bless you. It is only GOD that can’t be slaughtered or fall.
We lost to Liverpool. And that is GOD just telling us that HE is not the one wearing jersey number 10 for Barcelona. Because some of us were almost at the tip of such thought. He has cleared our doubts. Let’s not mistake the god of football to the GOD of the world.
We are reminded again. Lest we become like those who built an altar in Argentina to worship Maradona.
Congrats on a great season. See you next season. My love to your wife, three kids and the luckiest dog in the world.
Your GOATship Coronation spotter,
PS: How does a club like Arsenal and New Manchester United cope with many nights of disappointments? I almost committed suicide last night. I didn’t mention Chelsea because I never consider them a level-A club.